Friends and Family of Lottie Sophia Rhoads

Lottie faced death with the unblinking curiosity that served her throughout her life. As her death approached, Lottie told friends, family, and caregivers what her relationships with each of them meant to her. She planned details of her funeral and planned her cat’s future. Only in her final days did she wonder, “Why dying has to be so hard.” Those accompanying her through her final journey were humbled by her vulnerability and her strength.

Lottie was born Nov. 15, 1929. She raised two daughters with her husband, Francis J. Nitkowski. He predeceased her, as did daughter Deborah Dantzer. Her second husband, Robert Rhoads, also predeceased her. Lottie is survived by daughter, Deni Elliott; grandson, Kurt Schachner; and a large circle of friends who felt like family.

Lottie retired to Pinehurst from a nursing career in the Washington, D.C. suburbs in the late 1980s, eager to spend her last chapter gardening, golfing and playing bridge. But, she was soon bored by retirement and appeared at Moore County Regional Hospital volunteer services to request a weekly Wednesday morning shift, but only if she could work in the Emergency Department.

As the first ED volunteer, Lottie helped in the many ways her experience prepared her: she restocked trauma carts, dashed to the pharmacy or lab, offered a friendly ear for incoming patients and sat patiently with families in wait. Lottie was proud of her recognition as Moore County’s Volunteer of the Year in 2006. When double knee replacements — the second at age 82 — made walking difficult, she said that she distracted herself from the pain by counting how many people returned her cheery “Good Morning,” as she went about her duties. By the time she hung up her volunteer smock, Lottie had logged 26 years.

Lottie was a proud member of the elite Silver Foils golfers. She was also active in the Pinehurst Garden Club, Women of Weymouth, Carolina Philharmonic, and innumerable bridge groups. Lottie was a consistent donor and volunteer with her church and for local and national nonprofits.

Lottie was honestly interested in every person who happened into her life. With humor and insight, she visualized alternative futures and changed lives. That’s how caregivers who ministered to her failing body have found themselves on unimagined trajectories. Lottie showed people the path to their next best selves.

Lottie believed that a lack of funds should not stand in the way of people who had the ability to excel in care at the bedside. Thus, she will continue to transform lives by helping suitable nursing candidates complete their studies.